


My lap is cold. Warm it up for me?

by extralargebaguette



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Flushed Romance | Matesprits, I just deleted all my tags fuck, M/M, Trigger warning: swearing, even if it is pure fluff, lol k, oh also that im always a slut for davekat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 18:19:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7278709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/extralargebaguette/pseuds/extralargebaguette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat tries out some "pickup lines" that John told him to use.<br/>God dammit Karkat you ignorant fuck.<br/>And Dave is struggling with an awkward qt named Karkat.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My lap is cold. Warm it up for me?

**Author's Note:**

> Well fuck

You are Karkat Vantas and you have flushed feelings for Dave Strider. You are currently asking your good friend, John Egbert, for some "advice".

Pesterlog:  
CG: HEY FUCKASS GOT ANY TIPS FOR A HELPLESS ROMANTIC THAT IS TOTALLY NOT ME OR ANY FUCKING THING?  
EB: oh uhhh.....  
EB: yeah i got some advice!  
EB: (hehehehehehe)  
CG: OKAY WHAT IS SAID ADVICE?  
EB: use pickup lines on him!  
CG: PICKUP..... LINES...?  
EB: yeah pickup lines! here i will send some that you can use!

 

Be the cool kid  
You are now the cool kid and you are bored as all fuck.

You are scrolling on your TV for some slightly entertaining things to watch when suddenly your door slams open. You turn around too.....  
Okay enough of this second person bullshit.  
*COUGH*  
Dave turns around to see a slightly nervous looking Karkat standing at his doorway.  
"Oh hey Vantas what do you want?"  
"C-CAN I BORROW A KISS? I PROMISE ILL GIVE IT BACK!" Karkat basically shouts in Daves ear.  
"What."  
Karkat diddnt seem to hear Dave as he starts spewing out pickup lines.  
"ThatsaniceshirtcanitakeyououtofitDoyouhaveabandaidasiscrapedmykneefallingforyouDoyouhaveanameorcanicallyoumineOnascaleofoneto-"  
Dave cuts him off.  
"Shit man did Egbert get to you?"  
Karkat looks confused.  
"Like those are some cheesy ass pickup lines man."  
Karkat had a sudden realization that John was bullshitting him.  
"GOG DAMN THAT NOOKSNIFFER!"  
"Hhholy shit Karkat you took advice from one of the biggest pranksters?" Dave laughed.  
"But hey I will be yours anytime." Dave winks at Karkat.

About an hour in the future Dave and Karkat were snuggling while watching a romcom when Dave whispers to Karkat,  
"Do you like sleeping?"  
"What?"  
"Do you like sleeping?"  
"Uhh what kind of question is that and yes of coarse I do bulgesucker.  
"Me too, maybe we could do it together sometime?"  
"Gog dammit Strider."

**Author's Note:**

> I AM SO SORRY FOR THE SHITTY THE GRAMMER WAS AND HOW SHORT IT WAS OMG


End file.
